In what was a truly shocking (at least to this AI superfan) season finale of American Idol, David “Cookie” Cook took the season seven crown of American Idol by an approximate 12 million vote spread.

My American Idol mojo has been fairly off this season with only 1 out of the last 4 eliminations coming in where I expected them to. Carly Smithson out before Syesha? Brooke White out before Syesha? Castro out before Syesha? You get the drift. However, my season finale mojo has only failed me once with season two’s crowning of Ruben Studdard, a victory I still think was incorrect and later “covered up” by the AI peeps. Yes, I’m an American Idol conspiracy theorist. Don’t judge! The snacks at our meetings are totally worth being a member. I assumed I was safe with my prediction of this season’s winner even if I was disappointed with what I thought would be the outcome.

Dear AI Producers,

Thank you for giving the American Idol viewing audience the greatest cutaway shot of Simon Cowell in the history of the show.

Bringing back Fantasia and her craziness to the power of pi was pretty smart. Having her perform a song that is as wacked out of a song as I’ve ever heard, even smarter. Subjecting Simon to it and then giving us a cutaway shot of his expression at seeing Fantasia and her goodGRAVYjusthowshortarethoseskirts back up, um, dingers (singer/dancer) work it out as only they could on stage? True genius! I don’t even care that I couldn’t understand a word of the song and was horrified/oddly fascinated by the entire circus of a performance. The look was worth it all.

For the first time in Idol history I’m actually totally behind every song choice of the top four as they select from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame songbook.  Absent tonight were awkward song choices, Jason Castro’s mojo, and Paula’s ability to form anything resembling a coherent or relevant criticism.

David Cook heads up the show with “Hungry Like a Wolf,” a song best covered by Reel Big Fish.  Cookie does a decent David Cook version with plenty of growling and mic stand choreography.  Vocally, he’s totally solid, if a little bland with the song.  He does manage to complete my transformation into unrepentant fangirl.  I’m putting IGYPRH’s bro-mance with Cookie on notice.  DC has turned me into a squeeling 14 year old girl and I kinda don’t care.  Cookie also gets kudos with his second song choice of “Baba O’Riley.”  I was actually able to listen to this entire song and not once have a visual of Gary Sinise or anyone else from the cast of CSI: New York.  He puts his trademark spin on it and it doth rock mightily so saith I and the majority of the audience.  He should be smoothly into the top 3.

Not since season four of American Idol have we been blessed with a Broadway theme night. What’s that? You don’t remember Broadway night from season four? I’m not surprised. I am a Broadway aficianado and I barely remember it myself. For season four, only certain songs were allowed, and none of them were interesting.

This year, Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber replaces Barry Manilow as creepiest mentor to appear on the show, and “guides” the hopeful six to a night of interesting performances courtesy of some of the better and more famous song selections from his song writing catalog.

As with the performances the night before Idol Gives Back last year, this season again gives us “Inspirational” song selections from the eager eight. I wasn’t necessarily inspired to do anything by any of the songs or performances, but tomorrow night is when we’re really supposed to be inspired, so I guess it’s all good.

Our judges are all present and accounted for, some in body only (and by “body only” I mean, Great Googly Moogly, Paula. I’m a girl and even I can’t avert my gaze from the platter o’ boobies you’re displaying for all in a three mile radius to see). Randy and Simon are on par with their normal wardrobes and Paula is going to be very late for her prom and/or Oscar party complete with the overindulgence of pre-party “refreshments.”

Prepare to be Inspired!

We’re finally at the beginning of the end for the American Idol showdown. Some of the more entertaining and colorful of singers have departed and we’re left with what Seacrest claims is the most talented of finalists. While I don’t quite concur, I will give props where props are due.

This week’s outpouring of the Lennon / McCartney songbook brought some oldies but goodies and definitely some “whuh?”

Notably absent in the charisma department was Ramiele Malubay who bored just about everyone to tears with “In My Life.” Adorable and pretty sounding may get you the lead as the next heroine in whatever animated Disney princess movie may come out next year, but it won’t get you far in the land of AI. She’s as cute as a button and has the pipes to do well, but seems stuck in the rut of not knowing what to do with such a powerful instrument. Also? Stop with the cutesy pouting. It is neither endearing nor attractive.