Yeehaw, It’s Dolly Parton week on Idol. Dolly, who’s practically my next-door-neighbor, has an amazing catalogue that gives us one of the best all-around nights of the season. It’s interesting to compare how well the contestants handled Dolly’s tunes with the horrific Beatles train wrecks.

We start off this week with Brooke White and “Jolene.” It’s a nice start to the evening, as once again Brooke has picked a song that her sultritude (NAW) can shine on. Aside from one jerky, somewhat awkward number, of all the contestants Brooke has been the most reliable. Her stylist should get some kudos, ‘cause she’s managed to transform her from frumpy, Mary Poppins wannabe to frumpy hot rock star. Randy says it was alright. Paula rambles about something-something….consistent…emotional connection…something-something…you are Brooke White. Simon totally disagrees with Paula (apparently he speaks Paulanese), and thinks she was lacking emotion, and then says the violin player was weird.

David Cook does “Little Sparrow”, which is not one of the Boobied One’s biggest hits, but once again he rocks it.

After the Beatles Part Deux left me praying for a Merseyside mercy killing, it’s good that this week is over. What’s not good is that America threw the hot nurse out with the bathwater. While Ramiele flies under the crap radar once again (which is easier to do when you’re short….you have a smaller crapdar footprint), and Chikezie lives to sing (but hopefully not harmonicize) another day, Amanda “there-was-a-turd-in-my-Cheerios” Oscarmyer, Kristy Lee “wide-stance-McGee” Cook and Carly “Second Chance” Smithson found themselves on the chopping block.

 There was no way America was sending Smithson home. She couldn’t have really been that surprised to have made it. She had a bad performance, but her body of work till now would’ve been enough to put her through even if she had been actually bad. The reality was that she just wasn’t up to her usual par.